Your Expectations Are a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

A study of teachers and students revealed something uncomfortable about how expectations work.

In the 1960s, researchers told teachers that certain students in their classes had been identified as "intellectual bloomers" who would show unusual academic gains that year. The teachers believed it. They watched those students more closely. They encouraged them more. They gave them more chances to succeed.

By the end of the year, those students had, in fact, improved more than their peers.

Here's the twist: the "gifted" students had been chosen completely at random.

The teachers' expectations had become reality. Not because of any special ability in those children, but because of how the teachers treated them.

Psychologists call this the Pygmalion Effect. And once you understand it, you can't unsee it.

How It Works

When you believe someone will succeed, you behave differently toward them. You give them more attention. You interpret their mistakes as learning moments rather than evidence of incompetence. You provide more opportunities. You push them harder because you believe the push will pay off.

The person on the receiving end picks up on all of this. They sense your confidence in them. They try harder. They take more risks. They become the person you expected them to be.

The same process works in reverse. When you expect someone to fail, you pull back. You don't invest as much. You interpret their struggles as confirmation of what you already believed. They sense your doubt, and they shrink to fit your expectations.

What I've Seen at Camp

I've watched this play out hundreds of times over 40 years.

Tell a swim instructor that a particular child is definitely going to improve this summer, and watch what happens. That instructor pays closer attention. They celebrate small wins. They find creative ways to build confidence. And the child improves.

Tell a supervisor that their new counselor is going to be a superstar, and suddenly that supervisor looks for evidence of greatness instead of evidence of struggle. They coach more patiently. They give better feedback. The counselor rises to meet those expectations.

It even works directly with kids. Tell a group of campers that you know they're going to be the most spirited group in camp, and something shifts. They start acting like the group you described.

Using This Carefully

There's a catch. You can't tell people you're using the Pygmalion Effect. That breaks the spell. And you can't use it on everyone for everything. It loses its power when it becomes empty praise.

But you can use it strategically, especially with people who are struggling.

Imagine you have a new employee who seems nervous and uncertain. You could write them off. Or you could pull their supervisor aside and say something like: "I think there's something special about this person. Right now they're nervous and probably not acting like themselves. But I see real potential. Keep an eye out for it."

That supervisor will start looking for signs of greatness instead of signs of failure. And they'll probably find what they're looking for.

The Uncomfortable Truth

The Pygmalion Effect reveals something we don't always want to admit: our judgments about people aren't neutral observations. They're interventions. The moment you decide someone is talented or hopeless, you start creating conditions that make your belief come true.

This should make us all a little more careful about the conclusions we draw about the people around us. Your low expectations might be the very thing holding someone back.

Set high expectations. Have confidence that people will rise to meet them. More often than not, they will.

About the Author

Matt Kaufman has spent 40 years in summer camp as a camper, counselor, and director, studying what makes people belong, grow, and thrive. He writes about intentional community, leadership, and the intersection of technology and human connection.

Connect with Matt:

• Instagram: @mattlovescamp

• LinkedIn: Matt Kaufman

• Website: ilove.camp

Books by Matt Kaufman:

• The Campfire Effect: How to Engineer Belonging in a Disconnected World (February 2026)

• The Summer Camp MBA: 50 Leadership Lessons from Camp to Career